my.nwi.com

So I did it this morning. I did it with a t-shirt on and after a cup of coffee. I hoped if it was THAT bad, I could try again tomorrow without the t-shirt and BEFORE the coffee. But my weight gain was better than I had anticipated. I'm 8 pounds heavier than where I was. I'm 13 pounds heavier than where I wish I was. I was pretrified to weigh myself. I have a Dr. appt. for my annual well woman exam on 1/7 and had this vision of getting on the scale and my Dr. yelling at me...like I was a child being scolded by my parent. And I think to myself, get a grip! You're 47 years old. No Dr. should yell at you for anything let alone weight. So I decided to get a hold of my fear and step on the scale. And when the results weren't as bad as I thought they would be, I was both elated and motivated. So I put on my clothes and left for the gym. I would really like to take off the 8 pounds but cannot believe that's all it is. Maybe a skinny person thinks that's a lot, but for a former fat person, only having to lose 8 pounds is a dream come true.

What stuns and dissappoints me is the weeks of dread that preceeded the scale this morning. That's how long its taken me to step on it. Weeks. Before my weight loss surgery, I could have gained 10 pounds in the time it took me to gather the courage to weigh myself. This can be such a vicious cycle.

Life gets very busy. And being busy (or saying that you are busy) is very fashionalbe these days. In fact, having time is almost embarrassing. I sit on two boards, I work a full time professional job, I have a small business, I knit like crazy, have a ton of friends and some family (no children), a husband and sometimes I think my hands are full. I can't do it all, I can't do any more. Then I think about a coworker of mine who is married, has three children, a husband, a father who is ill, sits on every board imaginable, works full time and I think I'm not busy at all and I'd better "get to work". All this is to recogize how the best laid plans go awry. Like when I first started to write this blog, I thought what could get in the way of writing something every day? Last time I wrote was in NOVEMBER. Life gets in the way of a lot of things if we take our eye off our goals. It really is all about how we prioritize. That's how stuff gets done so when someone says they are so busy, what I hear is that's just not important as something else is.

Same is true of healthy eating and excercise. We really are only too busy for it if something else is a bigger priority. There are many weight loss surgeries. Some are restriction only. That means they reduce the size of your stomach but you absorb all the calories you take in. Lap band and the procedure I had (vertical (sleeve) gastrectomy) are both examples of restriction only. So the same old rules apply, calories in, calories out. If you eat more than you burn off, you gain weight. The strategy is that your stomach is smaller so you don't/can't eat as much.

Gastric Bypass and Duodenal Switch procedures are both restriction and malabsorbtion. So not only is your stomach size smaller, but your insides get rewired (a bit of oversimplification) and you don't absord all the calories your take in. So it's not supposed to be the same calories in/calories out equation.

With my surgical procedure, the majority of my stomach is surgically removed and less stretching than with a lab band. But if you consume a lot of calories or if you don't work out or both...VOILA!

Did I mention I love to have a drink or two? I did a few entries ago. If you do the math, you'll see my first problem. Say a beer is 150 calories (I love full calorie, full flavor micro brews). And say I have seven beers a week. That's an extra 1,050 calories a week in beer. Then say I have an equal love of candy and sweets which I can eat more of than I can count. So say that's an extra 2,000 calories a week. And then say I don't work out as consistently as I need to so I don't burn that extra 2,100 calories a week.

So you see where this is all going. I think I've gained back 10 pounds. I say I think because I'm afraid to get on the scale. When I do, I'll write about that too. How do I know I've gained weight? Because I can feel it in my clothes. It's your best indicator of your weight any way. But I can truly tell. The jeans that had some room in them don't anymore. No denying it. And all of it is in my rear end. Ugh.

So I need a renewed committment to all the things that work. That means cardio 4 days a week and weight training 2 days a week. Even G-d rested one day a week so I think I will too!

My dear love of micro brews needs to be cut back. One a day doesn't seem like much but yikes! Do the math! Haven't figure out how to make the reduction happen, but I will. And sweets! Those need to get reduced too. Especially at work. They are everywhere.

More later when I figure out a strategy that will work.